These guys love dirt- the Infielders

Finishing up the list. enjoy

Ryan Braun- I would so let this guy sleep with my sister. Not only is he Jewish (which my parents would love), but he also hits the balls harder than Jessica Simpson on (insert random celebrity man here). This guy's exploits puts Ed Hochuli to shame.

Craig Counsell- I don't think you can get scrawnier than this guy. I think he was on I Love New York 2 (sub-title: the Pelvic Inflamatory Disease connection) as cheesy. He's turning 38 this year, and looks 12.

Joe Dillon- see Gross, Gabe. Yost will bench someone good for a couple games of a hot bat and 3 weeks of nothing production.

Alcedis Escobar- a good defensive replacement who hasn't played beyond Double-A. He's still 22, but the only reason he's on the 40 man roster is so that no one took him in the rule 5 draft. Would that be that bad of a thing? Do we really need the next Neifi Perez?

Prince Fielder- CHUBSY!!! The name sake of this blog is awesome. I am pretty sure he has a clause in his contract for receiving a ham every time he gets up to the plate. A little history for you. He had a mohawk the last month of the season. Hense the name, "Chubber Lang."

JJ Hardy- Did you notice that he out hit Miguel Tejada last year? No??? You were too busy getting lost in his eyes. He is dreamy... In a completely non gay way.

Hernan Irrabaren- He's like Escobar, except Hernan will be the next Royce Clayton as opposed to Neifi Perez, and that might be useful if we were the Washington Nationals or another team looking to tread water.

Brad Nelson- The only good thing I can really say about him is that his Birthday is in a week. Happy early Birthday trade throw in.

Vinny Rotinno- You know this guy has a connected uncle. Maybe thats why he's on the roster. I just don't feel good about guys who collect jock straps.

Rickie Weeks- Let's hope this is his break out year, because thats what we've been saying for the past 2 years. I'm calling it now. This year he'll break out. Mostly because of a Kardashian sister fling.

Coming Soon: The Coaching staff including Nedly.